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Third Grader Learns Bullying Others Makes Him Feel Worse Inside

Third Grader Learns Bullying Others Makes Him Feel Worse Inside


“Who has a success story from last week’s lesson on saying “NO!” to negative peer pressure’?” I asked the question not knowing if any children would respond in front of their peers. To my sheer delight, a boy’s hand shot up into the air immediately.

“Janai, my friends and I were going to beat up Bret after school. But I remembered how it felt to make a bad choice with negative peer pressure when you taught us about it. My friends and I want to make Bret feel bad. This time I said, “NO!” to the boys who wanted me to go with them to beat him up.

We left Bret alone when I said, “NO!” I felt better last night than when we beat somebody up. I don’t want to bully kids anymore. It doesn’t feel good
in my body. And when I said I didn’t want to do it anymore, my friends decided not to do it anymore, too.”

I applauded Greg’s accomplishment and his willingness to share such a profound turn of events.

Greg was a third grade ring leader of a bullying group. At the time I was funded in a rural Oregon area for several years by U.S. Bank, Cow Creek Seven Feathers Foundation, philanthropists and other community groups. My program consisted of an approach I developed 40 years ago: 3D learning. I use visual aids to create experiences for children. 3D learning means taking objects from the external world to get the attention of the children to relate to their internal world. The Self-Help Program encompassed grades K-3, 113 children learning a weekly theme with a holistic, experiential approach such as anger, stress, self-calming, negative peer pressure, lying, communication skills, setting goals, how the mind/body/emotions work together, and much more.

The technique I used: For bullying and negative peer pressure I got a jute rope that was scratchy and 12 feet long, wrapping it around each student’s back, one at a time, as the student faced me in a roleplay. It was positioned under the armpits. I pulled it toward me which caused the student to come closer as I chanted things like, “Come on. Let’s go play. Your homework is boring. You don’t need to do it. Come with me or else I won’t be your friend anymore.” Tugging all the while I was saying these things to provide negative peer pressure, the student FELT physically with her/his whole body what happens psychologically with negative peer pressure. It could be SEEN AND FELT internally AND externally.

The way the student released and escaped the pressure was to take a slow deep breath to create inner calm, not struggle with the tugging (and bullying/negative peer pressure) and simply duck under the rope to step out of the pressure and struggle, releasing it. AMAZING results! Eyes opened like lights were going on inside each student when going through the roleplay. The dynamics of negative peer pressure were grasped in a new way that made sense to them. The solution to find another way to empower themselves and not be subjected to it was very clear. They learned for themselves how bad it felt to succumb to that pressure and how good it felt to be empowered in acting, not reacting. Having the experience with 3D learning accelerated the absorption of the concept beyond solely having cognitive information or a new rule to follow for someone else. These students loved knowing for themselves.

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Child Improves Her Life With Self-Calming and The Calm Song

Child Improves Her Life With Self-Calming and The Calm Song


“First my little brother took my shells and wouldn’t give them back.”

I asked, “How did you feel?” the 6 yr. old shared she felt “MAD!”

When I asked what choice she made, she answered confidently, “I sang the CALM SONG you taught us and then when he hit me I sang the CALM SONG and didn’t hit him back. Then he stopped hitting me.”

I asked her how she felt about her choice. She said, “I felt good and took deep breaths, too.”

I complimented her on making a good choice. She smiled and her eyes twinkled. EMPOWERING SUPERKIDS! It changes the course in life. And changes what is possible in the world!

CALM SONG

CALMING, CALMING, I’M CALMING MYSELF.
BREATHING SLOWLY, I’M CALMING MYSELF.

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Preschool Artwork Showing the Difference Between Negative and Positive Thinking

Preschool Artwork Showing the Difference Between Negative and Positive Thinking


It is such an exciting, passionate endeavor to teach preschool/K children about themselves. KNOW THYSELF is proclaimed by major philosophies to be a key to a strong, happy life. As an aging woman, I want to pass on to younger generations ways I have discovered to do just that: KNOW THYSELF. And the icing on the cake is to learn skills to manage thyself! Awareness is the first step….of internal resources with mind/body/emotions.

Using all the senses in a holistic teaching manner accomplishes a great deal more than just making a linear, cognitive statement such as “It is better to have good thoughts than bad thoughts.”

Children who get to experience the difference between bad and good thoughts get the sense of the lesson for themselves. Their awareness increases and as that happens there are more choices consciously of how to use those internal resources.

Artwork helps children to see the difference because, even if they cannot talk about it in words, they ‘get it’ and can feel the artistic expression, then SEE what it is that is going on inside them. These artwork samples are from 4 and 5 year old children. After having some experiences practicing the difference between bad and good thoughts they had no hesitation being able to show the difference. How exciting!

There is a continual thread of caring concern as an elder of this human tribe that lives in my heart. Creating opportunities for children to truly develop their own human potential is a key for positive changes on our planet that are dearly needed. Helping children to KNOW THYSELF gives a lot of punch in my Awesome Aging process.